Recurring (but Infrequent) Segments
- Andy-gram: When Andy Levy replaces Gutfeld as host, Gutfeld's monologue titled 'Greg-alogue' is replaced with Levy's 'Andy-gram'. This 'Andy-gram' monologue is delivered from Levy's libertarian political viewpoint.
- Ann-imals: Ann Coulter reads commentary while cute videos of animals are shown.
- Apology: This segment always immediately follows "Moment of Intolerance", where Gutfeld always insults someone. Gutfeld's apology usually contains an excuse explaining his moment of intolerance.
- Art Auction For Charity: Starting in early 2011, one of Gutfeld's drawings, often featuring unicorns or unicorn-heads on human bodies (unicorn/human hybrid), is put up for a week-long charity auction (viewers e-mail RedEye at FoxNews with bids). The highest bidder at the end of the week wins the drawing. Most winning bids have ranged from $500 to $1,500. Proceeds have been donated to two American veterans' charities: Wounded Warrior Project and TAPS. During the "Art Auction For Charity", Gutfeld uses his own celebrity to lampoon certain Hollywood celebrities, who do charity work for shameless self-promotion, by telling the viewers his motivation is, "It's not about charity, it's about me being awesome." On the May 14, 2011 episode, just two weeks after Osama bin Laden was killed in Pakistan, one of the highest winning bids (the highest winning bid ever was $7,600) was accepted for a drawing of a unicorn/human hybrid holding the decapitated head of Osama bin Laden. The winning bid for this Osama bin Laden related drawing was $2,258.
- Ask-Abee Huckabee: The panel (or "Red Eye Robot Theater" robots) asks former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee questions.
- Bill-a-Buster: When Bill Schulz replaces Gutfeld as host, Gutfeld's monologue titled 'Greg-alogue' is replaced with Schulz's 'Bill-a-Buster'. This 'Bill-a-Buster' monologue is delivered from Schulz's left-wing political viewpoint.
- Blogger of the Week: Gutfeld responds to a negative blog post about him.
- Father Knows Best: Father Jonathan Morris, a Fox News analyst and news contributor, answers questions from viewers on faith, religion, and ethical issues.
- Fox News Alert: A fake Fox News Alert done by Andy Levy. Previously, before its return, often having something to do with the King of the Belgians, Albert II.
- Greg-alogue: A comedic/satirical monologue which is delivered from Gutfeld's libertarian political viewpoint. This monologue is similar to what is seen on other late-night TV talk shows, but instead of several topics being referenced, a single topic is discussed extensively, much like "Talking Points" of The O'Reilly Factor. (When Gutfeld is absent, the 'Greg-alogue' is replaced with a '"Bill-a-Buster" when Bill Schulz is guest host, and a "Andy-gram" when Andy Levy is guest host.) Each "Greg-alogue" ends with a statement that includes an unprovable accusation such as "And if you disagree with me, then you're probably a racist." Formerly, Gutfeld ended the "Greg-alogue" with "And if you disagree with me, then you sir are worse than Hitler." This was done to mock his former co-workers at the Huffington Post. In 2010, Gutfeld began altering the accusation to "...then you sir are a racist homophobe." Later on, he started ending the 'Greg-alogues' with "...then you're a racist, homophobic..." and the third word being a varying phobia usually made-up by Gutfeld such as "...racist, homophobic taurophobe", or the Hitler accusation, i.e. "...then you're a racist homophobe and worse than Hitler." On the June 8, 2011 episode, Gutfeld temporarily changed the ending accusation to "And if you disagree with me, I was hacked." This change was in reference to the Weinergate sexting scandal involving Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY), where Rep. Weiner falsely reported "I was hacked" and then later falsely accused Gutfeld's friend, conservative blogger/author Andrew Breitbart, of being the hacker. With the start of The Five and Gutfeld presenting a monologue on that program, the Greg-alogue moved from a daily segment to a less frequent segment.
- Greg's Mom: Senior Correspondent Jackie Gutfeld, Gutfeld's mother, calls the program to give her view on the news of the day.
- Guess the Story: An obscure video clip is played and the panel has to guess what the story is.
- Halftime Report sponsor: Just before going to commercial, a voiceover attributes that night's Halftime Report to sponsorship by something mundane. The voiceover is currently done by one of the show's producers, Tom O'Connor. Previously, Gutfeld would thank whatever sponsored the Halftime Report, and then impersonate its reply.
- Hello Barry: Gutfeld plays a recent speech made by President Barack Obama with a laugh track inserted during the pauses.
- Jeff from Tallahassee: Footage of the "Red Eye Superfan" giving a brief non sequitur.
- Mail Time: Gutfeld reads letters and e-mails sent by the viewers. Prior to 2010, the segment was titled "Male Time" to correspond with images of muscular men in briefs. The images now appear to have been permanently removed, and the spelling is now the word "mail" in its intended context.
- Master Baden: Michael Baden, a forensic pathologist, appears as a "death correspondent" providing medical knowledge for news items involving bodies and death.
- Meet your Baker: Gutfeld reads letters from viewers to Mike Baker, a former CIA operative, who then responds.
- Messages for Greg: Gutfeld plays voice mails left by fans who have called his "direct line," (212) 462-5050. The audio messages are usually accompanied by looping video footage of playful animal encounters (i.e., puppies, kittens, or other pets at play).
- Messages from Mom: Gutfeld plays voice mail messages left by his mother.
- Moment of Intolerance: Gutfeld insults someone (or people who do something trivial but irritating), then offers an apology.
- Music Notes: Gutfeld talks to Mark Prindle about music news.
- Our View on the View: Panel discusses something that recently happened on The View.
- Polls, and Poles, and Poles: A segment covering polls, Poles, or poles.
- Pop Smear: Popular culture topics are covered.
- Proops' Poop: Comedian, Greg Proops discusses his opinions on topical events.
- Rachel the Zombie Girl: Each Halloween, Rachel of Blood Manor will appear on the show made up to be a zombie. The guests and the hosts do their best to ignore her, leaving the audience to wonder if she has invaded the TV screen.
- Red Eye for Kids: A preproduced segment describing the supposed origins or other information of something for the purpose of educating young viewers.
- Redeyepocalypse: Greg introduces stories which point to impending end of the world, such as Gwyneth Paltrow gaining a record deal, or the federal-mandated introduction of energy efficient Easy-bake Ovens.
- Red Eye Robot Theater: Short, pre-made sketches (usually with homosexual overtones between male robot-actors) using text-to-movie software from Xtranormal. Gutfeld refers to the computer-generated actors as "robot" versions of the characters they purportedly simulate (either Schulz, Levy, celebrities, or personalities from politics and media). Sketches usually end when one of the robots mentions lotion ("I'll get the lotion" or "Do you have lotion?" or "Keith Olbermann is going to stop by with the lotion. He gives an awesome back-rub."). Two examples from 'Red Eye Robot Theater' follow:
- Media Matters is frequently lampooned using 'Robot Theater'. After the Washington Post reported in March 2011 on a planned "On-camera Media Training Seminar" for Media Matters employees, Red Eye Robot Theater's criticism of Media Matters was expressed in the desperate plea of a Media Matters robot-employee:
- "I have no other skills. My job is to obsessively watch Fox News. If you take that away, I have nothing: no friends, no family, no life. I am a shell of a human, deluded into thinking I have purpose, when all I really am is a conduit for my boss’s simmering jealousy over past slights. Fox News is evil and wrong. Fox News is evil and wrong. Fox News is evil and wrong."
- On June 8, 2011, 'Red Eye Robot Theater' featured a female robot for the first time, representing the female involved in the Weinergate sexting scandal. This sketch was an re-enactment of an actual Facebook sexting communication between a Las Vegas female Blackjack dealer and Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY). The June 8, 2011, 'Red Eye Robot Theater' transcript follows:
- WEINER ROBOT: Off to the shower. This thing is bopping up and down.
- FEMALE ROBOT: Ahh, wish I was in the shower with you to help.
- WEINER ROBOT: You give good ?
- FEMALE ROBOT: I have been told really good and I love doing it.
- WEINER ROBOT: Wow. A Jewish girl who sucks . This thing is ready to do damage.
- FEMALE ROBOT: And every drop. How the do I get you here to help me?
- WEINER ROBOT: Thinking about your hot mouth with my .
- FEMALE ROBOT: The anticipation of you is driving me crazy. Come to Vegas so I can suck your for an hour. You must be in the shower. I am getting a very nice visual for bed. I will probably have some filthy dreams about you, again.
- Ron's Letters To Obama: Author Ron Geraci reads letters that he has mailed to President Obama.
- Schulz on the Street: Bill Schulz goes off set to do a report often involving talking to everyday people.
- Today in McConaughey: Gutfeld talks to the show's "Matthew McConaughey correspondaughey," played by shirtless Joshua McCarroll, about news relating to Matthew McConaughey.
- Tonight's Tool! (for Tonight!): Gutfeld discusses someone's statements he considers especially moronic.
- Twitter News: Andy Levy talks to Gutfeld about posts people have made on Twitter.
- Where Are They Now?: Gutfeld checks in to see what became of the stars (usually cats) of an internet video that was played on a previous episode.
- Unrest in Sheen: A segment where the cast talks about the current escapades of actor Charlie Sheen.
Famous quotes containing the words segments and/or recurring:
“It is not, truly speaking, the labour that is divided; but the men: divided into mere segments of menbroken into small fragments and crumbs of life, so that all the little piece of intelligence that is left in a man is not enough to make a pin, or a nail, but exhausts itself in making the point of a pin or the head of a nail.”
—John Ruskin (18191900)
“America is the worlds living myth. Theres no sense of wrong when you kill an American or blame America for some local disaster. This is our function, to be character types, to embody recurring themes that people can use to comfort themselves, justify themselves and so on. Were here to accommodate. Whatever people need, we provide. A myth is a useful thing.”
—Don Delillo (b. 1926)